You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name