how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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