you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
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