I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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