You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Randomize