I hate all girls vehemently.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
