did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Randomize