just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize