i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
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