She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
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