It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
