We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
