Yo dont text me then not text me
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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