so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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