we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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