Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
