If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
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