your parents love me but you hate me
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
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