she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
You asked me to text you at 11 and remind you that he's 33. It's 11:20. He's 33.
you're too late. he has eggnog and whiskey and all seven seasons of buffy. I shan't be coming home tonight
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
Randomize
