If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
