You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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