that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
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