wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?