kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
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