ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
