There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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