first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Randomize