Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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