matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Randomize
