Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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