If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
