some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Damn victory sex feels great
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