he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
only if we run a train.
done.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
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