It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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