STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
