Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
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