Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
