Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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