I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
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