Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
