We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
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I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
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My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
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