ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
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