where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
My hair reeks of homosexuality.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
