it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
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