Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
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