Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I cut my penus on the lid.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.