It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
