Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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