People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
Randomize