you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
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