Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
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