stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
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